"medical minimalism" is a gross mentality.
In other words: I am working on getting a new psychiatrist!
I think I can realize that the American medical system has its flaws while not falling victim to mentalities that have affected my family members negatively. I think that all good things come in moderation, and my taking so many drugs to kind of replace the need for facing my emotions is what was wrong with the situation, not the actual drug existing itself. My mom greened out her first time smoking and ever since believes weed is evil, and I just don't want to end up like that. I think me realizing why I actually used it SO MUCH is a big step, instead of just blaming it on the drug, LOL. Like, I'll still smoke very occasionally, just not as much as I used to. Balance!
Anyways, I was scared of relying too much on medicine, and slight negative experiences on different kinds had made me adverse to wanting to try anything else. I guess I am scared of losing control of my mind and not feeling Like I can help the things that I do, but I don't think that will change too much? And if it is, I think I could always talk to my psychiatrist about it.
I firmly believe that if you need medication, there is no shame in taking it. There is no issue in just taking a medication that you need to take, and relying on medication is not a bad thing.
I think being able to have some reliance is healthy. Being so anal about being in control leads to.. interesting behaviors.
I may update this, I may not, but I just wanted to clarify that I no longer believe medicine will make me evil or whatever. Those behaviors were me, not some medication. I don't know, I might delete the last post? Or at least not make it accessible to view. I don't like the sentiment I had while writing it, even though it doesn't say anything explicitly wrong.